30 Day Writing Challenge Day 26 (Things You Would Say To An Ex)

30 Day Writing Challenge Day 26 (Things You Would Say To An Ex)

Forgive me, but this one makes me want to laugh. There are many things that I would say t an ex or two. I have exes that I get along great with and I have others, that well… yeah I’d like to give them a long drop and a short stop, if you will. So the things I might say to an ex vary. This is going to be a really short post. But I will give you a short list of some of the things I have or would say to an ex, and would say again. 

Here goes; Things I’d say to an ex…

  • Dobby is a free elf, Dobby has no master!
  • I’d tell you to go to hell, but my friends and I don’t want your kind ruining our home away from home.
  • You whine like a mule.
  • I’d tell you to get your head examined but I know what they’ll find. Not a damn thing! As there is nothing up there.
  • I finally figured out you biggest issue… you suffer from Cranial Rectumitis.
  • Holy shit! Some one willingly bred with you, more than once?
  • I know a really high cliff just waiting for the right jumper, you should check it out.
  • I honestly don’t know what makes you so fucking stupid, but it works.
  • Just because I suffered a momentary loss of reason, does not mean you get to stalk me for the next millennium.
  • Look, I’ve come across your kind before, but I paid to see them. Now I guess I get to pay the rest of my life for seeing you for free.
  • I know you are nobody’s fool, but I’m sure if you ask nice someone would adopt you, for a price.
  • Were you born this stupid, or did you have to take lessons?
  • I’d tell you to go to hell, but given that I’m already there, please don’t add to my torture sessions.
  • I’m busy with my life, can I please ignore your whining some other time?
  • Sure, I’d love to meet up with you again. I’m thinking never sounds great, how bout you?
  • If what you don’t know, can’t hurt you… well babe you must be invincible.
  • Wow, a thought crossed your mind? Poor thing, it must have had a long and lonely journey.
  • Pardon me, but you’ve obviously mistaken me for someone who gives as damn.
  • Please don’t repeat your parent’s mistake… use birth control.
  • The best of you ran down your daddy’s leg.
  • You must be the poster child for abortion.
  • Would like some cheese with that whine?
  • You know what your most annoying attribute is? You’re still breathing…


Alright. I’m done. But you get the point. I have been and would be a terrible person. We all make mistakes. Sometimes we fall for the wrong people. Sometimes we find ourselves in bad situations. I say… LIVE AND LEARN!

I hope you had a good laugh. I know I did. Have a great night and whatever it is you are doing, I hope it makes you happy. What would you say to an ex…?


4 thoughts on “30 Day Writing Challenge Day 26 (Things You Would Say To An Ex)

  1. Oh, that cartoon made me chuckle. I’ve been scanning old photos onto my computer to save them and when I came across a few of a certain old boyfriend, my brain asked itself What. The. Fuck. Were. You. Thinking. Moron?

    Liked by 1 person

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