30 Day Writing Challenge Day 30 (One Thing You Are Excited For)

30 Day Writing Challenge Day 30 (One Thing You Are Excited For)

Well I’ve made it. All 30 days (plus a few where I simply couldn’t do my blog as life gets in the way). Tonight’s challenge… one thing I am excited for.

There are many things I look forward to in my life. But the thing that sticks out the most for me is to have my own “Forever Home”. I’ve bounced around my entire life. I rarely stay in one place for more than a couple of years, usually less. In the last 6 months I have moved four times. I am in the middle of yet another move, and will move again come the end of August if not sooner. I am used to being bounced from place to place and never putting down roots, but I don’t want that life for my daughter. She has moved so many times in her short life time and each time we pack and move again, her sadness breaks my heart.

So I have been working on plan to move somewhere that I want to be, not somewhere life dropped me without warning. I am making plans to have our own place, eventually even a house of our own. I want us to have our own rooms, and an office. I want to be in a neighborhood where my daughter can run about outside and not worry about three child molesters in the neighborhood, broken glass covering the streets outside, nosey neighbors that feel they have the right to spread rumors about me and mine across all kingdom come, and where she can make lasting friendships.

I have two final destinations in mind. One calls to me more than the other. But they both call to me in many ways. I am torn between the mountains of Colorado and the high desert of Arizona. Both are serene and beautiful, both have many wonderful attractions, both have friends and family that I miss every day. I spent 8 years on and off in Colorado and still love the true blue skies as well as the air that you can actually breathe. But I’ve spent a good bit of time in Arizona and I love it there as well.

I just want some place that my daughter and I can settle into and make a home out of. I want somewhere where we can put up posters and wall hangings, and run through the house naked if we wish. I want the freedom to invite friends over at all hours and have a good time without worrying about my roommates’s sleep schedules. I want a yard I can plant a garden in, and trees that my daughter can climb. I want a decent back yard with a privacy fence and fire pit so we can lay out under the stars any time of the year and be happy.

What am I most excited for? That’s easy… making my and my daughter’s dream of a forever home real in the next 1-2 years!


What excites you about your future? What are you looking forward to? What future plans have you on the edge of your seat with antici…pation?


30 Day Writing Challenge Day 29 (The Night of Your 21st Birthday)

30 Day Writing Challenge Day 29 (The Night of Your 21st Birthday)

WOW! My 21st Birthday? It wasn’t a typical party night for me that’s for sure. Let me start by explaining what I was doing for work at the time. I was working as a flight attendant on a 30 passenger Saab Turbo Prop, which meant that crew wise, it was just me and my two pilots. I started my day between 3 AM and 6 AM. And I had to work on my birthday. I had no intention of telling anyone it was my birthday. I figured I would do my three day trip and come home and buy myself a bottle of Tattoo. No biggie.

Let’s just say my plans sooo did not go the way I had intended.

I rolled out of bed, pulled on my uniform, grabbed my luggage and flight gear, and drove to our hanger. I went straight to my plane, put away my gear, and started my safety checks. Part of the flight routine is to make sure our galley is stocked with snacks and drinks. I opened my snack drawer and there was a giant birthday card with a huge button that said “Birthday Girl”, a sash that said the same, and a pair of goofy socks… all from my mother.

(To this day I still have no idea how my mother got access to my hangar, more the less my plane, or how she knew who I would be flying with, but she is a crafty woman and has a way of pulling off insane tricks.)

I didn’t have a chance to hide any of it, both of my pilots saw everything and wished me a very happy birthday. Little did I know I was about to get birthday wishes from around 100 people that day. We finished our flight checks, I strapped into my jumpseat, and we were off to Dayton for our first flight of the day.

Everything went normal as passengers loaded and were sat. All flight checks were ready, I called the cabin to let them know we were all set to take off. Everything was going great. Then over the PA, my captain starts his usual Good Morning, my name is…etc. Then he announces to the entire cabin that it is my birthday and would they all please join him in singing me happy birthday! I kid you not, all 30 passengers sang along with my pilots while I sat horrified in my seat. The rest of the flight was filled with birthday wishes from all of my passengers.

Each flight that day went about the same. I got sang to by my crew and my passengers. Our night ended in States College, PA. I figured the humiliation had finally come to an end. I was utterly wrong. I checked into my hotel room, threw on civilian clothes, and headed downstairs to meet my pilots for dinner. We ended up going to this bar that had amazing pizza and calzones. My crew bought me dinner, and few beers. I fell in love with YingLing that night. Oh gods, it was good. But I had to fly in the morning and we had to call it an early night.

Thankfully, hangovers are rare for me and eight hours later I was sober. Tired and dragging, but sober. The next two days were the usual routine for the trip. But, every single night my crew bought me drinks and dinner. It was a fun trip. Even if I did get humilated for my birthday…

I did end up getting that bottle of Tattoo when I got home, that and a six pack of something dark and intoxicating. I enjoyed my rum and coke in peace and with friends as well. It was a good birthday all in all.

No major party, no drunken mistakes… Like I said, a good one…

How was your 21st? Was it a wild party? Or maybe just a quiet gathering….


30 Day Writing Challenge Day 28 (The Word/Phrase You Use The Most)

30 Day Writing Challenge Day 28 (The Word/Phrase You Use The Most)

Explicit Profanity about to occur, you have been warned.



There are a couple phrases that I use more often than most. My favorite word is of course the wonderfully versatile word Fuck! I also enjoy Bloody Hell, Mother Fuck, Jesus Mother Fucking Christ, Whore Mongering Gutter Snipe, Bilge Snipe, and a few other fun phrases.

But my all time favorite line to this day is, “God damned, mother fucking, son of a bitch… is still not the safe word!”

Now if you have been reading my blog, or if you have read any of my work, you have probably figured out that I am a member of several alternative lifestyles. Some I am more open about than others, but for the most part I am an open book and I am public about my lifestyle choices. This phrase came about during an event for one of my alternative lifestyles.

I am very much Kink oriented and at several points in my life have been a very active member of the BDSM Kink community. I will not name names or anything outrageous. But let us say that I am comfortable with some of the Elite out there. Now when it comes to kink, I’m what most would call a “Switch” meaning I like things from both sides of the scene. In truth I’m mostly a sadistic Top with masochistic needs. I know, a lot of terms there, if you have questions feel free to ask.

Anyway, I digress. I was bottoming for a very intense and heavy scene. When I am being worked on, especially when it involves a certain level of pain, I tend to swear and curse a lot. I’ve made people blush, laugh, leave the room, and even call for help due to my vociferous reactions. It’s my let down and my way of coping. I enjoy the hell out of my scenes, but well, I have to let it out somehow and I am rarely one to just stand there and “Take it like a good girl.”

The scene was getting heavy and my adrenaline and endorphines were running very high. A hit came in across my shoulders that made me let out a stream of profanity. I screamed very loudly. “GOD DAMNED, MOTHER FUCKING, SON OF A BITCH!!!”  To which the reply was, “IS still not the safe word…” followed by more strikes.

I screamed something along the lines of, “Well fuck off and die then, that fucking hurt! You fucking ass!” And the scene continued until we were done. At any point I could have stopped the scene simply by saying, “RED”. And we would have been done right then and there. But I wasn’t ready to stop and I was having a good time. My partner knew that and so we didn’t have to stop even though other people in the area were concerned about us. We assured them before and after the scene that this was normal for us.

But now anytime one of us starts swearing up a storm, it’s usually followed by the quip, “… IS STILL NOT THE SAFE WORD!”


What is your catch phrase or favorite word, is there a juicy story behind it? Tell me my dear reader… I’d love to know.

30 Day Writing Challenge Day 27 (What You Wore Today)

30 Day Writing Challenge Day 27 (What You Wore Today)



What I wore today? Really? This is a blog subject? Sure, okay…

I wore a purple tie-die patterned, nylon/poly blend, scoop necked t-shirt. I wore blue sweat pants, with a loose wide pant leg. I wore mismatched socks, one was white with black polka dots and the other was yellow, green, orange, and leopard spotted. I wore matching black and white lace bra and panties. The matching underthings were incidental not intentional. I just grabbed what was on top in the drawer. I wore black sketcher running shoes. I put my hair up in a knot of sorts. And instead of my usual contacts, I wore my glasses as my right eye has been bugging the hell out of me.

Tomorrow… my clothing forecast calls for underthings, mismatched socks, knee braces, an ankle brace, a short dress or more sweats with a random T-shirt.

I hope this little glimpse of mundaity was useful. But to make up for it I will do an extra blog tonight.

Sorry for the brief summary, but fashion is so not my thing.. LOL

30 Day Writing Challenge Day 26 (Things You Would Say To An Ex)

30 Day Writing Challenge Day 26 (Things You Would Say To An Ex)

Forgive me, but this one makes me want to laugh. There are many things that I would say t an ex or two. I have exes that I get along great with and I have others, that well… yeah I’d like to give them a long drop and a short stop, if you will. So the things I might say to an ex vary. This is going to be a really short post. But I will give you a short list of some of the things I have or would say to an ex, and would say again. 

Here goes; Things I’d say to an ex…

  • Dobby is a free elf, Dobby has no master!
  • I’d tell you to go to hell, but my friends and I don’t want your kind ruining our home away from home.
  • You whine like a mule.
  • I’d tell you to get your head examined but I know what they’ll find. Not a damn thing! As there is nothing up there.
  • I finally figured out you biggest issue… you suffer from Cranial Rectumitis.
  • Holy shit! Some one willingly bred with you, more than once?
  • I know a really high cliff just waiting for the right jumper, you should check it out.
  • I honestly don’t know what makes you so fucking stupid, but it works.
  • Just because I suffered a momentary loss of reason, does not mean you get to stalk me for the next millennium.
  • Look, I’ve come across your kind before, but I paid to see them. Now I guess I get to pay the rest of my life for seeing you for free.
  • I know you are nobody’s fool, but I’m sure if you ask nice someone would adopt you, for a price.
  • Were you born this stupid, or did you have to take lessons?
  • I’d tell you to go to hell, but given that I’m already there, please don’t add to my torture sessions.
  • I’m busy with my life, can I please ignore your whining some other time?
  • Sure, I’d love to meet up with you again. I’m thinking never sounds great, how bout you?
  • If what you don’t know, can’t hurt you… well babe you must be invincible.
  • Wow, a thought crossed your mind? Poor thing, it must have had a long and lonely journey.
  • Pardon me, but you’ve obviously mistaken me for someone who gives as damn.
  • Please don’t repeat your parent’s mistake… use birth control.
  • The best of you ran down your daddy’s leg.
  • You must be the poster child for abortion.
  • Would like some cheese with that whine?
  • You know what your most annoying attribute is? You’re still breathing…


Alright. I’m done. But you get the point. I have been and would be a terrible person. We all make mistakes. Sometimes we fall for the wrong people. Sometimes we find ourselves in bad situations. I say… LIVE AND LEARN!

I hope you had a good laugh. I know I did. Have a great night and whatever it is you are doing, I hope it makes you happy. What would you say to an ex…?

30 Day Writing Challenge Day 25 (Four Weird Traits You Have)

30 Day Writing Challenge Day 25 (Four Weird Traits You Have)

WEIRD TRAITS? Please, Oh Mighty Interwebs… define “Weird Trait”?

According to dictionary.com: Trait


a distinguishing characteristic or quality, especially of one’s personal nature:

bad traits of character.

a pen or pencil stroke.

a stroke, touch, or strain, as of some quality:

a trait of pathos; a trait of ready wit.


“A trait is something about you that makes you “you.” When your mother says that you get all your best traits from her, she means you have the same charming smile and the same brilliant mind as she has. In science, trait refers to a characteristic that is caused by genetics.” ~Google

So here goes four of my weirder traits and/or characteristics.

1. Like the God of Mischief himself (AKA Loki), I can have a silver tongue in opportune moments. And on occasion I have been known to have a gift for dead, forgotten, and ancient languages. On a good day I could sell hell fire, damnation, and ashes to the Devil himself. On a bad day I couldn’t give away fresh, cold water, in the middle of the Sahara Desert.

2. It may appear that I am disorganized, but GODS FUCKING FORBID IF YOU MOVE A DUST MOTE… I will smite you! No really I live in my own little bubble of organized chaos that only makes sense to me and me alone. To me, my world and space function perfectly fine. To the outer world… good bloody fucking luck finding anything smaller than my bookcases without explicit directions. Unless of course you are my mother, the wench that she is, she can bloody walk into dungeon full of hay and find a needle without trying.

3. I wear the sun and stars on my very sleeve, well actually on my very body. And no, they aren’t tattoos. I have two very unique birthmarks on my right wrist. On one side I have a five pointed star and on the other I have a sunburst. They are not utterly obvious, but they are there if you pay attention. It’s kind of nifty to tell you the truth.

4. When I am in pain or overly stressed, but mostly when I’m in a lot of fucking pain, I have my own personal form of turetts that hits me. I scream, swear, kick, fight, hit people, and basically swear like a drunken sailor during a bad bar fight on a Friday night. I get really creative with the use of profane language and insults. I’m learning how to get it under control to some degree, but in moments where I’m overwhelmed… well the language gets reeeeaaaallly nifty. Also, during moments, of shall we say… passion…yeah the language monster spews forth things that will make your mind do a double take.


I hope this amused you dear reader. It took me all night to think of four of my more unique traits that wouldn’t give too much of my life out into the open… Do you have any “weird traits”?

30 Day Writing Challenge Day 24 (Something You Miss)

30 Day Writing Challenge Day 24 (Something You Miss)

Something I miss… I try to live without regrets. I try to live my life with the knowledge that there is no back button. My life, sadly, is not one of my novels. I cannot, as much as I would like to, delete and rewrite the parts that didn’t work so well. I cannot go back and fix things or change things. I try to live for the here and now, and let the past be my teacher for the future I am trying to build for me and mine. So really as much as there are things, people, and places that I miss. I know I can look back at those memories and go back to those places in some ways.

Something I miss. I think one of the things I miss the most is my health. I miss being able to go on 13 mile hikes over an afternoon and not wanting to die after the first 20 feet. I miss being able to climb mountains and rock scramble without a care in the world beyond my severe fear of heights. I miss being able to walk through the woods on a quiet summer night and listen to world come to life around me. I miss dancing at every opportunity. I miss the feel of the cool earth sinking between my toes after a long run. I miss chasing my daughter, and playing with her and not being exhausted after getting out of the car.

I miss being healthy enough and in shape enough to enjoy being active. You really have no idea what it is like to be able to do martial arts and live steal fighting, running and swimming, hiking and climbing… and then hurting yourself beyond traditional repair, and finding out that those things you took for granted are no longer within your grasp.

I miss spending the entire weekend climbing to the top of a mountain, looking out over the world as far as the eye can see, and knowing that some small part of me has conquered this mighty giant. In that very moment in time, I stood on top of the world and faced the universe with glee. I miss the feeling of sheer accomplishment, knowing that I faced my fears and pushed myself beyond what I thought I could do until that very moment.

I miss winter nights in the mountains of Colorado, standing in the freshly fallen snow as it freezes over and looks like diamonds under the stars. I miss standing on our porch with my mother and brother, as the wind blew across our rooftop and turned the starlit night into a snow glob all around us. I miss the feeling of awe and innocence and peace and oneness that we had in that moment. Nothing has ever been so pure as that moment of quiet peace was for me.

I miss so many people that I have lost over the years. I miss their laughter, their smiles, their hugs and kisses. They way their perfume or cologne smelled. I miss the little things. I miss the way someone used to braid my hair every single day. I miss the way someone and I used to sit up and talk for days about everything and nothing, and then we would go about our lives until one of us needed to talk again. I miss reading old books and poetry while we lay in bed with someone else. I’ve lost so many and I miss each of them everyday.

I miss my critters that I have had the joy of sharing my life with. Some for years and some for mere moments in time. I miss the affection they shared with me and mine. The laughter and joy they brought to our lives. Again, I miss the little things.

So when asked to name one thing I miss, I guess the answer is this: I miss the little things.

What do you miss the most my dearest reader?